Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Jesus: "Oregon State will win the Civil War"
Portland, OR (UPI) In a statement sure to ruffle the feathers of Duck faithful in prisons and welfare lines everywhere, Jesus today announced his pick of the 113th Civil War football game, to be played thursday night in Gommorah-esque Eugene. "They are mostly godless heathens, those duck folk. I won't feel bad at all in putting a grand on the Beavs!" Jesus added that he will be watching the game with Beaver faithful in Tualatin, Oregon, including famous OSU alumn Todd C Wilson. Before being whisked away by his assistants, Jesus added "I'm not going anywhere near that Tower of Babel, I'll be with my peeps & Jack on ice."